Ship ahoy
by Lonaargh
Summary: Jack has gone after an evil pirate, a very evil pirate.. a pirate that has stolen his ship.. ! No! The horror! Chapter 18 up..
1. Secret Magic Closet

_Wieeej__… I'm back… This is the sequel to "dream on". If you haven't read it.. well… can't really say that'll matter a lot. Just sit back and have fun._

_Disclaimer: I don't own Jack, or Oro or Chloe.. I do own my drivers license though.. (I passed today! Yay!)_

_Chapter 1: Secret Spider Closet Another Dimension Door.._

At this very moment: "I hate my boyfriend. He totally stood me up today!" We were supposed to go to the movies. Him, me and my best friend Tina. And that good for nothing dipstick called 5 minutes before the start of the movie and said he couldn't make it. "Why do you ask? Because he was watching a certain television program with a certain blonde in it that has certain big front cushions.. Grr! Needless to say he isn't my boyfriend anymore for awhile."

"I really think you should sit and calm down a little.." Tina and I are in my bedroom now, we didn't go to the movies anymore but went back to my place and put on the dvd Pirates of the Caribbean.

"I don't WANT to calm down.. I like being pissed off! Gives me energy.. and besides.. He deserves it, that stupid, ignorant, idiotic, good-looking, sweet, aargh.. see what he made me do?!"

Tina grins her –Yeah right- grin: "Sure.. as if.. you know just as well as I do that you won't be mad at him for long"

-Glare- "Shuddup… this time I will.. he screwed up! I mean.. what did I do to deserve to be treated like that? Shoved aside for some dumb extremely good-looking actress with two huge airbags?" The anger is slowly flowing away, making room for another feeling. One that I don't like that much: Sadness.

I feel a single tear rolling down my cheek, angrily I wipe it away. I don't want to feel sad. It wasn't my fault! Tina gives me a hug: "Don't cry! You know what? If it makes you feel better we could go to his home, slip some drugs in his beer and torture him with feathers while he's tied to his chair". Tina is the more sadistic one. But hey.. sadistic is good… and fun… right?

Suddenly I see something in the movie that doesn't actually belong there. It's a blonde pirate girl. About 15 years old.. holding a sword and peering through my TV glass.. Trust me.. It looks odd "Lona? You there? Don't tell me I've got the wrong TV again" –Blink- "Tina? Remember when I told you about that weird dream I once had? About Jack and Will and Lizzie and this girl named Chloe?" "Lemme guess.. Chloe is the girl who's tapping on the inside of the screen?" –Nods-

-Taps on tube- "Chloe? That you? Waddaya doing there? No..wait…wrong question… HOW did you get there?! I want to do that too!!" "Lona! Finally, after 27 tries I found the right TV! Listen carefully, you have to" "Hey you! It costs a shilling to tie your boat.." "Shut up! As I was saying: you have to come to Port Royal! Quickly! Norrington is behaving strange, he has joined Jack in a quest to retrieve the Black Pearl.. again.." "Ey.. It ain't as if I lost it on purpose!" "Well, it bloody well is starting to look like it!" "Not!" "Is!" "Chloe.. this sounds great and stuff.. but how am I going to get there? It isn't as if that island is right next door or something"

Tina taps on the screen: "Looks solid to me" Chloe motions for us to come and sit a bit closer to the screen: "All you have to do is go into your closet, after that you'll be here.. Fun huh?" "Yeah..fun.. erhm.. you do have some spare clothes lying around? I don't want to be seen in some awful pink dress again. And I don't think pink is Tina's colour either" "Sure, whatever, just hurry up! Norrington is really annoying! Save us before we go insane here!". –Zip- The screen went black. "Lona? Does this mean she broke you television?" I stare at my TV intensely: "For her sake, I hope not". Tina walks towards my closet, but stops when she realizes I'm not following her…yet. I grab my bag and stuff as many clothes in there as I can: "Erh… What are you doing? Didn't Chloe say that.." "Right.. she said that… she also said _Whatever_ in that same sentence… not a word that gives me a trusty feeling" After finishing that I take a deep breath and look at the picture of me and my boyfriend, a quick smile flashes over my face as I turn the picture face down on my desk: "This will be the ultimate test then… let's see if I really love you enough". With a quick run I grab Tina's arm and drag her into the closet with me. It's dark in the closet… and spiders like to hide in dark spaces.. I hate spiders –gulp- "Tina?" I whisper "Yeah?" "Does the inside of this closet start to look Port Royalish to you?" "Nah… and neither does that spider that has been sitting on your shoulder for the past 3 minutes" "Thought so.. SPIDER!!??"

Shrieking and yelling I dash out of the closet, running towards my bedroom door in order to get that bloodthirsty monster off my shoulder.. –SPLASH- "Hey Lona! This isn't your bedroom anymore. This looks more like Port Royal! By the way.. there was no spider" Splattering and spluttering I try to look as angry as I could: "You're telling me.."

_Yay! Finished chapter 1. So… whaddaya think? Stop… Continue? Gimme hints and/or suggestions.. I like them.. Gotta go for now.. Ta ta!_


	2. Pirates Dictionary

_Back.. yet again.. I dreamt about this story last night.. weird.. _

_Disclaimer: I don't own POTC, nor do I own Chloe or Tina.. I did ask their permissions to be used in this story though.. SO DON'T SUE!_

_Chapter 2- Pirate dictionary_

"Ye have to tell me, lass. How come you and I always meet each other in the waters of Port Royal?" Jack is standing on the dock, grinning like a madman. He obviously finds this very amusing. Soaking wet I climb back on shore, luckily I gave the backpack to Tina; otherwise all those clothes would be wet too. "Lona! Girl! Long time no see" Chloe gives me a big hug, not minding my wetness "Yeah, I know. How come you didn't leave Port Royal?" She shrugs "I didn't want to" Erhm... sounds logical.

"Ahem..." Jack stands behind me, and he doesn't like being ignored. Tina walks up to him and grabs his hand to shake it vigorously: "Hello Captain Sparrow, so good to meet you, my name is Tina, but some people like to call me Oro, tell me...are those teeth real? Did it hurt? I would really like to have such teeth too" Chloe stares at her: "Who is she?" "That? Oh, that's my best friend, Tina, but some people call her Oro".

After al the introductions I'm aware of the staring gazes of Jack and Chloe. "What? What are you people looking at?" I look at Tina, who's suddenly wearing a gorgeous dress. All velvet, black and purple, way down to her ankles. Her bodice is deep purple with laces crisscrossed over it. Absolutely to drool about! Somehow her shoes didn't change with it; she's still wearing her army boots. She looks very gothic now. Nice! Then, I start to get a suspicion "Oh no.. don't tell me.. not pink.. please not pink!" Tina starts to snigger: "Well.. It suits you.."

I growl at her and grab the backpack. I peer inside, and close it quickly again. "Lona, everything alright? You look as pale as a ghost" Tina takes the bag and looks, after that she starts laughing. The bag topples over and reveals 4 pink dresses, all as girly and icky as the one I'm wearing already. Jack looks at them: "Well, you'll be glad to 'ear that I saved that dress Barbossa gave ye". "You did? Why? You're not a.. you know what.. are you?" Tina eyes him suspiciously. Chloe stares, and walks a little circle around him, looking at everything: "Well, he doesn't look like a eunuch.. but then again.. not everything is at it seems. Tell us Jack, how long do you wear dresses already?". "I don't!" He replies in disgust. "Then why did you save that dress?" "Because I was hoping she'd come back one day"

-Blush- Sweet. Tina looks at both of us: "What happened between the both of you? Does Jay know about this?" Quickly I snap out my dreamy state: "Nothing happened! I woke up remember? It was just a dream in which nothing happened, although that dream appears not to have been a dream after all" Chloe nods: "Yeah, magical closets can be a bit tricky sometimes". I start digging through all those pink dresses, throwing them one by one in the salty water. "Hey.. this isn't pink.. it's black!" After opening the front of the backpack I found something. It is my summer dress. It's all black and a bit Spanish looking.. but also a bit short. "Everything is better then this..this..thing!" I disappear behind a box, Tina and Chloe are hiding me from Jack's (and other men's) eyes while I change dresses. "So.. Jack. The Black Pearl's gone again? How on earth did you manage that?" "Ey! That wasn't my fault! I just, kinda erhm.. ye know..." "No I don't know" "Ilost'erduringacardgame" I appear from behind Chloe and Tina again.. not sure I really did understand what he said.

"I really must have misunderstood that. For a minute there I thought that you said you lost the Pearl in a cardgame.. silly me" Jack shifts around, not feeling comfortable "Heh.. yeah.. Silly you.. whatever gave you thát idea? I didn't lose. Barracuda cheated! Ye now luv', that dress really looks nice" –Blink- "You actually did lost the Pearl? To Barbossa?" Chloe shakes her head: "No, not Barbossa, Barracuda. Barbossa was a dead undead pirate. Barracuda isn't dead.. or undead.. he is alive, and actually a bit handsome, but he is mean, and nasty, and he cheats. Jack here was stupid enough to think he could see through his tricks and beat him. Huh.. Barracuda sure taught him!"

Tina and I look at each other.. "Barracuda? What kind of name is that?" Jack mutters a bit: "He cheated! He made me drink all this rum, against me will I tell you!" –grin- "Yeah right" I laugh "You, not wanting to drink rum? Do you really expect us to believe that?" Tina glares around: "Talking about that, where's dear William?" Chloe answers: "Nobody knows, he hasn't been his old self again after Liz left him for Ragetti. She just adored his wooden eye she told me" Eww... I really didn't want to hear that. "So, what has Norrington got to do with all this?" Tina asks.

Jack shrugs: "Really couldn't tell, lass. He popped up 2 days after I lost me Pearl, acting all strange, sayin' he was a pirate now" "He even used a dictionary to talk like one"

"Ah, there you all are! Uhm.. I mean –rustle of pages- ahoy there mates, ready to set sail? Indeed.. lovely morning we're having don't you agree. Ah, young miss Lona, welcome back I'm sure. Ahem.. aye..erhm..argh..right.."

_Another chapter done.. Up to chapter three now!_


	3. You liar!

_I'm bored... So here comes chapter three:_

_Chapter 3: You liar!_

"Norrie? Is that you? Why in heavens are you dressed that odd?" When I say odd, I really mean odd. He's wearing a big pirates hat, like the one Will's wearing in the end of the movie, only larger, with 3 feathers pinned on it. He's not wearing his wig anymore, revealing short brown hair that's just visible underneath the preposterous hat. A spotless white blouse, with pearl buttons on it, and bright red baggy trousers complete his appearance. Looking more closely I see something that arouses my laughter even more: "James, you're not growing a beard now are you? You're not the beard wearing type, trust me!".

James looks a bit hurt: "But, all pirates have beards! It should make me look more manlike". –Sigh- "James, what are you doing? What's wrong?" James' face tightens: "I was.. forced to seek out for another occupation" "What?" Chloe finally stopped laughing: "They fired you? Why?!" "For my not being able to succeed in the capture of Sparrow here" "That's CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow if you please" "So now I seek my fortune in piracy" "And a jolly good job you're making of tha' mate" Jack says sarcastically. "Enough of this, we must find the Black Pearl back, and fast". Tina brightens up: "Yeah, and with that, Jamie here can capture Barracuda and be back into the grace of the guv'nor"

Our first plan was to find ourselves a ship.. and with that, also a crew. The latter wouldn't be too much of a problem. That dress I'm wearing attracts men like flies. Unfortunately one flie isn't to be swatted off that easily: Jack.

"Serious luv', I was heartbroken when you suddenly disappeared that day" ignoring him I walk on the harbor where the navy newest ship lies anchored. "Ladies, and Jack ofcourse, may I introduce to you the fastest ship in the Caribbean: The Capturer. Word has it, that she can outsail even the Black Pearl!" James states proudly. Jack doesn't agree with this, and starts a whole argument with James, this doesn't help a lot when you're trying to hide. "Will you two be quiet?!" Chloe smacks James in the head.

Two guards pass us by, we creep towards the ship carefully. "Jack, I've got a plan, you come with me"

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"Everybody stay calm, I'm taking over this ship!" Jack and I jump on board. Or actually: Jack jumps, and he drags me with him, holding his pistol pointed at my head. "Or I'll shoot the lady" Gilette appears "This ship can't be crewed by one man, and certainly not you, Sparrow. But to spare the lady's life, we'd be glad to leave this ship and see you blunder around" "I'll release 'er just as soon as I don't see any of you around anymore, savvy?"

After the sailors have left, Chloe, Tina and James appear. With the 5 of us, sailing away to Tortuga isn't that much a problem.

"Ah..Tortuga" I smile "I always wanted to come here, Hey Tina, waddaya say? Shall we get some rum and become very drunk?" Tina eyes widen and a big grin appears on her face: "Yeah! Let's do that!" Before I can walk away Jack grabs me by the arm: "Hold it right 'ere luv, shouldn't ye be searchin' for a crew?" I smile my sweetest smile at him: "You're the captain here, right? So it's your job to find us a crew, I don't know nothing about crewing people". Jack smiles and pulls me closer to him: "Perhaps we should let the other three search for a crew so that you and I can finish where we left last time". Fortunately, a black haired girl walks up to us: "'Ho is she?" she asks and motions with her head at me.. This should be fun: "I'm his girlfriend, didn't he tell you?" I ask innocently. Jack looks at me with an evil glare in his eyes: "No, Julia, listen, she means.." –Smack- Julia hits him and walks away "Lona! I sure as hell didn't deserve that!" Jack yells at me, holding his cheek. –Smack- I also hit him: "So, you couldn't stop thinking about me could you? Kept hoping I'd come back some day did you?" When I walked away angry, I could hear James ask: "You didn't deserve that either?" Jack sighed: "No.. that one I deserved"

_Later that Night_

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"Noooo... I don't wanna sleep!" I like being drunk.. it makes me feel all light and happy. Tina is drunk too.. so.. we're both drunk. Double drunk fun.. hihi.. Jack has found us while being in a little brawl with some other girls and is now trying to bring us back towards the ship.

"Listen luv', I found ourselves a crew. You can inspect them tomorrow, and I also heard someone talk about Barracuda, I think I knew where he is" I wrap my arms around his neck in a tight hug: "Good for you, you naughty little pirate you. You know, you were a very bad boy today.. Dunno why.. but I definitely know you were bad" –hiccup-

James is carrying Tina, she can't even stand on her legs anymore. For some reason she's hitting on him: "Ya know Jamie? Ya actsually look handsjsssome without your hairthingy" She snuggles a bit closer up him in his arms. "Why thank you miss.. but I'm afraid that you being intoxicated doesn't encourage me to take that compliment very seriously" Tina thinks about this for a while, and then nods: "You're right.. you shouldn't do that... but I still think I'm right.." She gives him a big kiss on his cheek before she falls asleep in his arms.

On board of the ship, Jack and James part. James takes Tina to his cabin and Jack takes me to his. He kicks open the door and puts me on my feet to close the door again. It's dark in his cabin, dark and warm. Owh boy... darkness and being drunk don't go together.. I'm swaying on my feet here. Finally Jack lights a candle, just in time to see me fall down on the floor "Ouch.. thanks.." "What're ye doing on the ground lass? That's no place for a lady" He picks me up from the floor again, holding me tightly to prevent me from falling again. Not good, not good, I have a boyfriend.. I don't want this. But.. nothing happens, he leads me to his bed and tells me to sit and listen. "Off course I went to meet other women, I didn't know if I'd ever see ye again now did I?" "Yeah, but you said.." "Pirate.. remember?" "That's no reason to tell me a lie!" "Aye, you're right about that, and I'm terribly sorry. But tell me lass... who's this Jay your friend talked about?" Oh..right..

"Oh.. that.. He is my ex-boyfriend" "Ex luv? You sure 'bout tha'?" I glare at him angrily "Sure I'm sure, I'm pretty sure he is not my boyfriend anymore.. he just doesn't know that...yet!"

_How will Jack react? Will he accept this explanation? Who is this Barracuda guy? That and more in the next chapter!_


	4. Lemme sleep okay?

_I'm supposed to be something that's called "work" around here.. but I don't feel like it. So I figured I started on chapter 4 already._

_Disclaimer: I don't own POTC, nor any of the characters that play a part in this story. I asked permission to the ones that aren't part of the cast of POTC._

_Chapter 4 Lemme sleep okay?  
  
_

"Not yet love? So technically speakin' you two are still together?" Pouting I look up in his brown eyes: "Well.. not really. He just doesn't know that I broke up with him, he does know I'm mad as hell at him. And.. hey.. wait a minute! You're trying to blame all this on me!" He cocks an eyebrow: "What do I blame ye of exactly then? You were blaming me of lying to ye, remember lass?" Aww.. It's pretty hard to think when your mind is clogged up with rum: "Erhm.. yeah.. I remember… I also remember that you didn't apologize or have given me a good reason!. Jack?" I said his name very quiet and gentle, almost like a little girl: "Do you mind if we argue further in the morning? I wanna sleep now..okay? Please?" With every word I say I can hear my voice grow weaker. Jack smiles : "Sure lass, 'ave a goodnight's rest. But we wont argue in the mornin' y'hear? It's not worth it" With that he winks and gives me a little kiss on my forehead. I nod, and close my eyes…

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"Ilona! Wake up already! You're late… and you snore! It's almost as if you've got a very angry lion in here! Wake up!" This is not the way I want to be waked in the morning. The first thing I saw was Tina's face, next thing I was aware of was her shaking me at my shoulders.. Now I've got a bad mood and a headache. So what she said about an angry lion: It's all true.. that'd be me!

"Get off me Tina.. And let me sleep! 5 more minutes mommy…please?" Tina just grins and pulls my blankets off me. Wait… blankets? I don't remember lying under blankets… Glancing down I see that I'm wearing nothing but a nightgown.. no big problem there you'd say. I'd say that's a pretty big problem.. it isn't mine!

Jack strolls in: "Mornin' ladies.. had a goodnight's sleep?" My face feels hot while I quickly pull the covers back and try to hide.. well.. .everything that should be hidden. "Hello Captain" Tina says: "Lovely day we're having don't you agree? Well.. I gotta go now.. I've erhm..I.. erhm… oh.. I hear my mother calling… yes mom.. heh.. bye". Jack and I stare at her as she walks out of the room quickly. "She does realize she's on board a ship.. right?" Jack asks while he scratches his chin. I grin "Yeah.. but sometimes she's just… like that". We stay quiet for a moment.. I scrape my throat before I talk: "Jack?" "Yeah" "I'm in somebody else's underwear.. would you please leave so I can change?" He looks at me as though he just realizes I'm not fully dressed and in bed. He smirks: "Need some help with that luv?" I growl at him and grab a shoe. Luckily for him my throwing skills haven't improved much, so I missed. He laughs and walks out of the room, leaving me alone.

I'm just putting my dress on when Chloe bursts into the room: "Ohmygod! WhatdidyouwithJack?" She doesn't even bother to take a breath between the words. "What do you mean with what did I do with Jack?" I ask puzzled. Chloe jumps up and down all excited: "He's whistling ever since he left your cabin! He can't even be bothered by Norrington being annoying asking a lot of questions". I hop around the room with one shoe on my foot and the other one in my hand "What's that got to do with me? He's getting his Pearl back, no wonder he's happy" –thud- Crap.. I'll never learn hop-putting-shoe-on. Chloe leans against the bedframe, arms crossed, a pondering look on her face: "Dunno.. perhaps.. but wouldn't it be cool if he really liked you.. you know.. as in… LIKE you?" I'm helping myself up again: "Nah.. he wouldn't do that. Come on.. we've got a crew to inspect!"

On the dock there's a large queue of sailors.. all sturdy, muscled, big men. Oh boy! I really like this. Must be my lucky day.

Tina and I walk along the line, just like 2 little kiddies in a toystore after closingtime.. "That one!" "Oeeehh.. yeah! And that one!" "That one too" "And the big one with the ponytale" "The slim one with all the muscles and tattoo's too!!". Chloe is walking somewhere behind us, asking every guy she likes for his phone number. "Chloe.. they don't even know what a phone is!" She looks insulted: "Hey! You can never know.. perhaps I'm lucky and one of 'em does have a phone number… e-mailadres will be fine too!".

Jack and James, on their turn, walk behind Chloe. They're reselecting the sailors that we selected, James muttered something about us "behaving like old women on a market". Tss.. the nerve of that guy. "Hey Lona, look at this one!" "Wow! Hello, tell me… do you come here often?". The guy stares at my legs.. "Aye Ma'am, born on the sea me dad' always said" Chloe shrieks in excitement: "Ohmygosh.. what a wonderful accent! Tell me.. do you have a girlfriend or are you married in some sort of way?". Jack grabs us by the arm and drags us away from him: "Call me!" Chloe yells at him. "Jack, why did you do that? It was so much fun!" I pout while I look longing towards the queue. He rolls his eyes: "Because the three of you weren't selecting anybody.. you wanted to take 'em all! How bloody big do'ya think this ship is?" We look at each other, feeling a little bit guilty: "We're sorry Jack" We say in unison.

After another 15 minutes we finally selected a crew worthy of the ship. We had to leave a lot of those really cute sailors behind, but Jack allowed us to take at least 3 of them with us.

James walks up to him as he stands at the helm: "Tell me, mr Sparrow.." "Captain.. Captain Jack Sparrow" "Quite.. as I was saying, tell me.. how do you know where this scoundrel Barracuda is hiding?" Jack smiles his – Wouldn't you like to know?- smile: "I just know son, I've got a feeling in my guts". Chloe, who was standing near giggled and called: "Yeah..a feeling in your guts.. and a map in your trousers, ey Jack?" He makes a "grrr" sound as he turns to Chloe: "Missy.. do you really think it wise to be making a fool of a pirate?" He puts his hand on his sword and pretends to be drawing it. Chloe isn't impressed, instead, she's rolling over the floor, grasping her stomach while laughing really hard.

Suddenly, a familiar voice sounds from behind Jack: "If you want to live, you'd better put that sword away Jack". Along with that, the sound of a sword being unsheathed echo's over the ship. Jack can barely see the tip of a sword that's pressing against his throat.

_Who is this mystery man? Will he let Jack live? Please review! Or not.. just… do whatever you like._


	5. Ferocious Barracuda?

_Yay, I got reviews!! -Does happy dance- Anywho, I'm at work again, bored again. So.. here comes chapter 5: PirateBlondie: Grmbl.. how did you knew that? Oh.. wait.. it was pretty obvious wasn't it? -grin- Stay tuned for more adventures of.. well.. you! Barley Shadow: Yeah.. I'm jealous at me too.. Being a writer is fun.. too bad it all happens in your imagination.. luckily for me.. I have a real vivid imagination! -really, really, really big smirk-  
  
_---_Chapter 5: The ferocious Barracuda?---_  
Not impressed by the very sharp and pointy thing in his neck Jack grins: "Well, if that ain't our little whelp. Welcome back son, now put that thing away. I wasn't going to hurt the little miss,.. much..". Chloe hears the last sentence and promptly stops laughing: " Hey! I heard that!".  
  
Will takes his sword from Jack's necks and puts it back in its sheath. He turns his gaze towards Tina: "Ah, a new member of your clique Jack? And who may I have the pleasure of meeting?" He asks her, grabbing her hand and giving it a gentle kiss. Tina stands there for a moment.. blinking her eyes and staring at Will. Who, by the way, is just staring back at her. A big smile breaks through on her face, she grabs Will's hand and shakes it: "Hi! I'm Tina, pleased to meet you mister Turner!".  
  
Chloe scrambles back unto her feet and pulls Will's jacket: "Ey.. mister ponytail.. Where've you been all this bloody time? Jack and I were worried sick!". Jack raises his eyebrows: "Jack and I? 'Cuse me? I wasn't worried one bit! He can manage himself now, I meself taught him everythin' he knows". Will eyes Jack, but decides not to say anything. Smart move if you ask me.. having an argument with Jack usually means you lose and he wins.. even though he isn't right.  
  
I myself don't like Will very much, he let Barbossa made me walk the plank! And he said I was a pain in the.. uhm.. behind! Elizabeth is much better off with Ragetti, such a nice fellow, that is, if you like men with wooden eyes, dirty hair and a natural dislike of soap. Chloe is still tugging on Will's jacket: "Will! Answer me!". Annoyed he pulled the seam of his jacket out of her hands: "I was hiding on this ship, I overheard you talking in the alley where I was thinking about me and Elizabeth. I want to join you all on your quest to return the Black Pearl.. also was I hoping for a job as first mate on the Pearl once she has been returned" he added, with a shy look at Jack. Jack looks stunned, shocked, angry even: "You what? Lad, listen, when I told you that you'd have to square with your pirate blood some day I didn't mean it for you to be doing it on MY ship!".  
  
Will looks hurt, he just can't win today can he? I mean.. been left by Lizzie, stuck on this floating piece of driftwood, and worst off all, not getting a job from Jack Sparrow! I can't stand the sight of his puppy eyes, looking all sad and not happy. Not to mention betrayed by the man who he thought to be a friend. That's it, I'm going to help him: "Jack Sparrow!" "Captain!" "No, you're not worthy of the name 'captain' if you're just going to leave Will standing here with nothing! He has just lost his fiancée, his job, his dignity, and he is a eunuch! And you dare to tell him that you don't want him as our first mate? Where's your heart man?". Jack seems to be thinking it over, doing so, he looks at Tina. His eyes begin to shimmer, he obviously has a plan. "You know what Luv'? You're absolutely right." –blink- "What?"  
  
He walks up to Will and shakes his hand "I changed me mind, welcome on board sonny." Chloe cocks her eyebrow: "You sure do change your mind a lot when you're with Will". Jack grins: "Aye.. I suddenly remember what a fine lad he be" "Is" I corrected without even thinking about it. Jack stares at me: "Aye.. be"  
  
"Well, well, well.. mister Turner. It seems you didn't take such as good care about your life as you did for my sword". Hey! That was a mean remark! Will stands face to face with Norrington: "You're wrong James, I might have lost Elizabeth, but at least I've had the pleasure to take her away from you. Tell me, how bad did you feel back then?". Oh no.. no no no.. this is bad, this is very bad. Chloe and I grab Will, Jack and Tina grab Norrington, they definitely don't like each other anymore. "Bad Will! Down boy, down!" Chloe says sternly to Will. Trying to hold back Will I snap at Jack: "Let's put them in their cabins, before they decide to kill each other". "Well.. that wasn't too bad now was it?" I rub my jaw, Will had hit me there with his fist, trying to struggle free to hurt Norrington. Great, now I really don't like him anymore!  
  
Jack looks a bit sad at the string of hair in his hand, Norrington pulled it out, mainly because of the same reason as Will.. Tina and Chloe have a tummy ache right now.. from laughing so hard! – Gives angry glare- "Cap'n! Sail ho!" shouts the cute muscular pirate with the very extremely sexy accent.. please tell me when I'm exaggerating,.. no.. really… I mean it. "Sail ho? Yeah.. well.. that ain't too weird is it? We're on the sea here! Who's sail is it man?!" Chloe yells at him.

Jack pushes Tina away from the helm and grabs his spyglass: "Finally!" He sighs. I snatch the spything from his hands and peer through it: "Erhm.. Jack… these sails have a fish on them!" "Aye luv'. But that's not any fish.. thát's a barracuda. A ferocious animal, almost as bloodthirsty as the meanest sharks in the Caribbean". –Blink- "I thought you said that was the piranha" Tina thinks and says: "Nah.. can't be, piranhas don't live in the Caribbean.. do they?" "Well actually.." Jack doesn't let Chloe finish: "WILL YOU SHUT UP ALREADY?" he shouts. I stare at him.. I've never seen him this cranky before, well.. once.. but that's because I made fun of him. "Cap'n?" The cute sailor asks. "Aye?" We're gaining on 'em sir".  
  
_There.. another short chapter.. I simply don't have the discipline to make them longer I think.  
Enjoy! I'm gonna go work some more.. 1.5 hours left until weekend.. then.. I got to drive a car!! Finally!! Did I mention I passed my drivingexam??  
'Til next time Lads and Lassies.._


	6. What are you doing here!

_Here's the next chapter! Enjoy it!_   
  
**_Oro: Stop whining... you're telling my whole story before I could even finish it.. ;-) I'll see what I can do.._  
  
**_Chapter 6: What are you doing here?!_  
We sailed alongside of the Black Pearl, Jack let out a scream: "He renamed her! That dirty good for nothing sea dog renamed her!". On the side of the Black Pearl someone had painted: "SS Sexy", in white plaster paint. Jack absolutely doesn't like this, he stamps his feet and looks awfully angry. "When I get me hands at him, I'll keelhaul him!".

Chloe yells: "Ship ahoy! Anyone at home there?". No answer. Tina looks at me, and I shrug. How should I know what to do? Chloe grabs a rope and swings towards the SS Sexy, formerly known as the Black Pearl. "Hey! Wait for me!" I shout to her, but when I grab a rope to do the same as she did, someone grabs me around the waist: "You ain't going nowhere luv'. Much too dangerous" "But.." Jack snatches the rope from my hands and Tina snatches it out of his hands in turn, sticking out her tongue at me and Jack,and flies towards Chloe. "No buts luv', I ain't risking your live. You're staying put while I go and get your friends back". While he is talking he pushes me towards my cabin, and before I realize what he's doing, he closes the door and locks it! "Jack! You useless piece of –peep-! Unlock this door! Do you hear me?! JACK!"

Suddenly I hear gunshots and men shouting. Scared I hide myself under the bed, just in time. The door flies open and a few sailors come bursting in: "Nothing here". They run out again, leaving me behind, still hiding under the bed. I lay still for a few more minutes. After that I begin to grow bored and crawl unto my feet again. Well.. at least those men unlocked the door for me. Outside it's awfully quiet. Careful I peek around the corner of the door, nobody's to be seen. "Hello?" No answer.. "Will? James?" Still no answer. Come to think of it.. the Black Pearl is nowhere to be seen anymore.. Damn. I knew she is fast.. but 5 minutes and out of sight? That ís fast! The doors to the other cabins are busted up bad, James and Will are gone. Probably taken by those pirates. Going down the hold I hear a sizzling sound.. looking around I see a trail of gunpowder.. on fire!. "Awh crap". I run up the stairs as quick as I can. When I reached the deck I jumped in the water, but before I hit water the entire ship exploded! Pieces of wood fly everywhere, some even missed me by an inch as I'm swimming to safety. "Bloody Pirates" I grunt as I turn to watch the ship sink..

­­­­­­­­­­­­­­­ ----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

_The Next Day: _"Not again... I hate deserted islands.. they're too bloody.. deserted" I wake up with a very hot sun burning in my face. "Well.. I wouldn't call it deserted.. 2 people ain't deserted is it?" With a shock I jump up and look right into the face.. erhm. Wait.. that's not entirely true. He's too damn tall for me to look at his face.. so I looked at the throat of a tall blonde guy. "Two people? You and me I reckon?" I ask, squinting my eyes trying to see his face: "Nah.. me and this other guy.. he looks angry all day, muttering something about not belonging here, you should find him on the other side of this piece of dirt". Hmm.. interesting.. someone complaining about not supposed to be here sounds familiar: "Well.. erhm.. gee.. thanks... my name is Ilona.. or Lona.. whatever suits you best" I'm rewarded with a big smile and a firm shake of the hand: "Welcome on DuckIsland, I'm the Prezzz of this island" Duck Island? Prezzz? Owhkay.. "Prezzz right? Great name.. Listen.. I need your help.. I want to get off this island and.." "I protest!" –blink- "Excuse me? You protest? Against what?" "I'm not sure yet.. but I'm certain I can find something that I don't agree with, I alway do so you know? I'm a rebellion." "... right.. anyway.. I need you to help me and save my friends.. they've been abducted by this weirdo named Barracuda" " I know him! I protest against him too.. I will help you"

Oh no.. a fruitcake.. "Uhm.. sure.. if you'll excuse me.. I'll try and find that other person.."  
Strolling along the beach, all I see is water.. and sand.. and a few palm trees.. but nothing more. Suddenly a few footprints appear in the sand, footprints made by sportswear. Aha! That's a clue! Following the footprints a find a shelter made by leaves and branches, not very good constructed. You can tell because it falls apart when you look at it. "Hello? Anybody home?" "Go away!" I know that voice.. I know that voice too well! "Jay? Is that you?" Somewhere behind a rock someone shuffles his feet, and when he talks again, he tries to alter his voice a little: "No.. it isn't.. Go away!" –sigh- "Jay.. I know it's you.. that high pitched voice isn't fooling me.. you tried that before remember?" "No I didn't! That was my very low voice then.. ow crap"

From behind that huge rock a person appears, a guy. Not too tall, but not small either. Okay.. I lied.. he is small.. Dark reddish hair, blue green eyes that look a bit guilty and cranky. And overall very handsome.. but that isn't an objective opinion. I introduce: My boyfriend!

_Wiieej.. my boyfriend in the story.. isn't he cute? Please review!! _


	7. A secret hallway

_La chica Triste: Whehe.. my boyfriend's mine alright.. I dunno if you can get Jack or Will yet.. or maybe Barracuda.. -idea pops in head- oew.. that's an idea.. just read on.. you'll see what I've come up with for you..! Thanks for liking my story.  
  
Disclaimer: I don't own POTC. Everybody in this story that isn't POTC gave their permission to be used in this story.  
  
Chapter 7: A secret hallway_  
  
"Jay? What the heck are you doing here?". I've never been more surprised as up to this day. He shrugs and looks away from me: "I could ask you the same". "No you couldn't, I asked you first". "Did not". –sigh- He is supposed to be 22 years old.. but honestly.. at times like this.. he looks 5 "Jay!" "Yes?" "What are you doing here?" "Nothing". Grrrr "JAY! SPILL IT!" "Alright alright.. jeez.. no need to make a fuss over it". Guys. Sometimes you'd just want to kill them all.. and then bury them alive or something? "I came over to your place to apologize for my behavior when I heard you and Tina talk to the tv. Next thing I knew you two jumped into the closet, so I went after you to tell you I was sorry and stuff. And whammo.. I'm stuck here on this piece of mud with that Prezzz guy. He's weird.. he doesn't agree with a single thing I say!".  
  
How sweet... but something's fishy here. Not very sure what it is.. but.. wait a minute.. : "So.. you were so sorry hmm? But then again.. what you did wasn't very nice right? Tell me.. what was it again?" I ask. His face goes a little bit pale and he begins to stutter: "Well.. I.. I.. I erhm.. did.. uhm.. I forgot your birthday again?" He hazards.  
  
"I knew it! You don't even know what it was! You..you...yerk!" I turn around and walk-run away from him. He runs after me and grabs me by my arm: "Lona, will you please listen to me?" "Why should I.. you never ever listen to me!" "Lona.. I really ám sorry.. No, I don't know what I did wrong, but.. I hardly ever know. You get mad at me for the most silly reasons..". My mouth drops open when I hear this.. now he blames me? I pull my arm back and walk on when I hear his voice again, desperate and a little bit lonely: "Ilona.. I love you"  
  
As stung I freeze on my spot, slowly I turn around. Somehow he's standing very close to me now. "What did you say?" I whisper. He looks a bit insecure: "I said that I love.." Before he can finish I press my lips against his. We stand like this for a moment.. or two.. his hands gently move down my back towards my lower back.. We're almost forgetting about everything else when I hear someone say: "I definitely protest against this! Get a room you two!". Jay growls a bit – Oeh.. butterflies in my stomach!- but let's me go eventually.  
  
Disappointed I kick against a stone that's lying on the beach randomly, that stone hits another place on the beach –boink- and.. surprisingly.. the beach sounds hollow. This place is getting weirder and weirder. First.. you need to jump in and out a closet to get here. Then I see James in a pirates costume. I end up on this deserted island with my boyfriend and this rebellion pirate dude.. and now.. it appears they also have hollow beaches.  
  
"What this? Another smuggler cache?" I peer at the place suspiciously. Carefully I prod it with my shoe. Looks solid enough. Then I step on it. It still doesn't budge. Maybe I heard it wrong, maybe the rock hit a hollow tree or something. A very soft crackling sound is heard.. it grows louder and louder. Suddenly I'm aware of the ground sinking away below my feet! That stupid hatch (because that's what it was) doesn't even give me time to scream as I plummet down the corridor it was hiding. With a -thump- I hit the bottom of the corridor, not very softly I might add.  
  
"Lona! Are you okay?" Jay shouts down. "Yeah.. yeah.. I'm fine." I groan while rubbing my butt. "You can't be fine!" I hear Prezzz's voice say: "You just fell a few feet down.. you must've at least hurt yourself". Grrr.. stupid pirate! " Thank you for reminding me". Carefully Jay and Prezzz lower themselves into this hole. "Hey.. I wonder where this leads to". Jay grabs my hand and pulls me along the lane. Prezzz hesitates a little. "C'mon! What are you waiting for?" I shout at him, as the distance becomes larger at the minute. "Well.. I.. I'm fond of DuckIsland..I don't want to leave it!". Jay stops and looks back: "You can always come back afterwards". He thinks about it for a while.. then he smiles and runs after us. "You're right! Let's go me hearties!".  
  
Two hours later  
  
"Prezzz.. can't we take a break? I'm exhausted" Jay pants. We've been walking for over two hours now and still there's no end to this tunnel. I've also just remembered that spiders LOVE dark hide-outs like this. So basically I'm freaking out now.  
  
Prezzz looks around and grimaces :"Nah.. I think we're almost there. And besides: I don't do breaks.. they're not good for you. Makes you lazy and stuff". "I protest!" Jay says and stubbornly sits himself down on the ground. Prezzz stands still.. almost as if he didn't hear it right: "You what? I protest against you protesting!". "Boys.. don't.." "Oh yeah? Well.. I protest against all your protesting of the last couple of hours!" "Now.. please guys…" "Humpf.. I protest against YOU!" "Oh yeah?" "Yeah" "Oh yeah?" "Yeah!" "OH YE.." "Stop it!!" I scream.  
  
They both look at me.. then Jay points his finger at Prezzz: "He started it" "Did not!" "Did too!" "Taddletale" "What? Lona!!" Argh. How could it be, that two almost grown men behave even more childish then a whole schoolyard of toddlers? I grab Prezzz and Jay at the ear and drag them along with me. "Will you two behave already?" I mutter. I turn around a leftcorner, and suddenly I'm blinded by a very bright light. "Awh.. crap. I think we found the exit guys". Jay blinks his eyes, which are watering and a bit red: "Nah.. you think?".  
  
Prezzz takes a deep breath: "-sniffing sound- ahhh.. Tortuga.. I will never forget that fine bouquet of smells as long as I live". Jay sniffs too.. and his face gets this not so natural color: green. "Bouquet? What cow ate it I wonder?" He says while he keeps his nose closed. Prezzz ignores him, and walks into an alley, obviously searching for something. He mutters something under his breath: "Left here.. or was it right? Blast these alleys.. there too much of them.. I'll write a protest letter to the mayor!".

He walks into another alley: "AHA! Found it!" We're standing in front of a pub named "The Drunk Wolf". "This my friends, is the most famous bar in the entire Caribbean". He opens the door and walks in.. a drunken sailor flies past him. Apparently he was thrown out by that big, very big, red haired bartender who is standing in front of us… looking awfully mad… -gulp- _  
  
There..chapter__ 7 is done.. I think I'll start writing chapter 8 immediately… have fun with 7 for the meanwhile. And please let me know what you think.. even flames are appreciated._


	8. Le Djinquije

_La Chica__ Triste__: Whaddaya mean ew? He really is a very nice dude you know? Ghehe.. Anywho.. My boyfriend has this habit of always talking himself out of trouble.. especially when I'm mad at him. Pretty frustrating at times. Dislcaimer: I don't own POTC.. everybody else gave permission.. I think.. yaddayaddablahblah don't sue me.  
  
Chapter 8: Le Djinqujie_  
  
"And stay out" The man growls, not paying attention to Jay and me. He turns around, bumping into Prezzz. First the bartender started to growl.. until he saw who he bumped in to. A big broad smile breaks through on his face as he hugs Prezzz: "DUDE!" "DUDE!". Apparently they know each other "Dude? That word isn't invented until.. owh… let's say.. about 400 years later. With some 100 years give or take.". I whisper. Jay shrugs: "Perhaps they're the more.. modern type of guys.. you know.." Prezzz points to us: "Ey Wolf.. those are my rebel friends.. Jay and Lona. I'm helping them to defeat that evil pirate Barracuda". The Wolf Bartender doesn't say a thing. He just eyes us, nods and walks back into his pub.

Prezzz smiles happily as he leads us into the pub and sits down at a table. Wolf comes and sit with us, he still doesn't say a word. Prezzz lays a few golden coins on the table: "Well mate, Give us something to drink. Lona..what do you want?" "No Rum please.. I've had enough rum to last myself a lifetime". Wolf starts laughing: "Rum lass? In The Drunken Wolf we don't drink rum.. here we drink beer! And lots of it!". Shortly after that 4 mugs of beer are standing on a table. 3 empty.. one half full. The three men are chatting merrily with each other about boats and surprisingly ...cars. I myself stare at my half full mug of beer, trying to come up with a plan to rescue everybody and become the hero of this story  
  
"So.. Wolf.. will you join us?" Prezzz asks him as he slams 4 more beer mugs on the table. "I'm not sure, what are the benefits?" Wolf says. Prezzz laughs: "Benefits? We don't need benefits.. It's us!! Us against the world mate!! So what do you say?". The Wolf guy seems to be thinking it over. A grins slowly glides over his face: "I say aye". And there goes the third mug of beer this evening. Please hold in mind that these mugs can contain an amount of 0.40 gallons beer.. So my dear little boyfriend is swaying on his stool. Prezzz and Wolf are drinking the other 2 mugs I didn't drink. Annoyed I look the other way.  
  
A really big painting of a guy holding a flag catches my eye. No.. not because of the person posing on it. The Black Pearl is on the background! And she has fishes on her sails! I jump from my chair and rush towards the painting to examining it from close range.  
Yup.. it definitely is the Black Pearl, and the painting is pretty new. The paint is even still wet! "Prezzz! Wolf! Jay! Look at this! Who is this guy?" Prezzz and Jay just shrug, but Wolf looks as though he has just smelled something really rotten: "That's monsieur Le Djinquije, a big womanizer. The one thing he loves more then his women is himself" Ah..hence the big picture.  
  
"Hmm..perhaps he knows more about Barracuda and the SS Sexy" "SS Sexy?" I hear Jay say, followed by a lot of laughter. Not paying attention to that I ask Wolf another question: "You wouldn't happen to know where this Djinquije fellow lives, now would you?". "As I matter a fact.. I do" he says.. a huge grin on his face.  
  
_Later that evening_"  
Wolf.. are you sure this is the only way to get in?" I whisper. I'm standing on Wolf's shoulders, clasping tightly to the window sill of a great mansion. To be more specific: the great mansion of Monsieur Le Djinquije. "Aye lass.. the doorway is too common to use as an entry.. breaking in is the way we should it". "WHAT!.. You mean we could've gone in using the front door?!" Wolf just sniggers and gives me an extra boost. Clumsily I fall into a room, a bedroom.. and in this bedroom lies.. Le Djinquije!! EEP!  
  
Very carefully I sneak out of the room, trying not to make a single sound. Out of the bedroom I take a deep breath, that fellow didn't wake up. Descending the great stairs of that mansion I take a little look around. Everywhere I look I see the face of Djinquije. He sure does love himself. Silently I open the frontdoor, not so silent Wolf, Jay and Prezzz burst into the mansion. Making enough noise to wake the dead. "Damn! Look at all those paintings! How much do you think they'll be worth Wolf?". Wolf shrugs: "I wouldn't give a penny for 'em. Got enough pictures in the pub" We walk upstairs again, obviously those three have a plan. The not so funny part about that plan is that I don't know anything about it! Jay and Wolf go ahead in the bedroom of Djinquije, Prezzz and I stay behind looking for a feather. Luckily and very conveniently this guy has those knight harnesses standing everywhere.. with feathers in their helmets!.  
  
When we walk into the bedroom I see Djinquije tied up to the bed, awake, with a paper ball in his mouth! "Oh my gosh! Jay! What are you doing?" He looks at me, shocked: "Me? I'm not doing anything! Why do you always think I did it?" "Well.. perhaps because you're the one with the rope and the paper" Wolf says, helpfully. The Djinquije person looks very mad. "Alright buster, you are going to tell us everything we want to know.. or else!" "Ow wess wfa?!" "What?" "OWF WE WFAS?!" Prezzz looks puzzled. "Erhm.. Perhaps you should take that gag out of his mouth" Wolf suggests. "Oh..right.. ghehe.. I knew that".  
  
Prezzz gingerly takes out the gag, Djinquije takes this opportunity to yell at us: "How dare you invade my home like this, you savages! But go.. go ahead. Plunder my house, rape and kill me, do whatever you want. At least, I shall be known as a great man." He holds his head up proudly, almost looking like a true hero. Jay frowns: "What? Rape you? Ewww!! No man! We just want to ask you some questions. Man, you're gross" Djinqujie thinks about this for a while: "Oh.. well then.. go ahead".  
  
_End of chapter 8! What will Le Djinquije tell? How are the others doing on the SS Sexy? Read and find out! Love, Lona._


	9. En Garde

_Hellow.. Back again this time.. Thanks to everybody who reviewed.. plus my friends at Spannend. Not a very long chappie.. don't have much inspiration.. Dunno if I'll continue. I'm thinking about a original story actually.. I'll see what I'll do..  
  
__Disclaimer: see last chapter  
Chapter 9- En Garde._  
  
"And after that, he dumped me on this jolly island named Tortuga" . I'll give you a brief explanation of what just happened here. All Djinquije could tell us was that he didn't know where the ship was. He just saw it lying in the docks someday, dragged his painter with him and forced the man to paint that picture. He didn't pay the paintguy, so that guy got really pissed off, kidnapped him and dumped him here. It took Le Djinquije 2 hours to tell us this.  
  
"Well.. he doesn't know scrap.. let's leave" Wolf sighs.  
"Wait!" Djinquije cries "You can't just leave me here! All tied up.. and stuff". I roll my eyes: "Prezzz, please stuff the gag back into his mouth. My headache is getting worse". Prezzz grins sadistic: "It'd be my pleasure".  
  
Outside I sit down on the sidewalk. My chin in my hands, thinking very hard. The boys are still inside, torturing Djinquije. "Pssssst" Hm.. sounds like someone has a flat tire: "Pssssssssst" or maybe it's a killer snake! "Ey! You!" I turn around and see this.. weird guy standing in an ally. He walks up to me, smiling a friendly smile. A bit too friendly, I think when he comes closer. Somewhat like a fox that sees a chicken.  
  
"That's far enough" I tell him, showing him my sword "What do you want?" The man, a bit taken a back by the sword looks around suspiciously "Is you alone?" he whispers. I glance at the window, in the candlelight I see the silhouette of Prezzz, Wolf, Jay and a feather. Shortly after that, a horrible laughter is heard.. the laughter that one laughs when one is being tickled under his bare feet with a feather. I shrug "Yeah.. well.. reasonably alone. By the way.. you don't say IS you alone.. it's ARE you alone".  
  
"I knows where the Black Pearl be" Agh.. and I thought my grammar was bad "Do you now? And where might she be, if I may be so bold to ask?". He grabs my arm and drags me towards a dock "Hey.. let go or I'll skewer you like a shish kebab!" He lets go of my arm, and points with his finger in the direction of a ship. "Yeah.. well.. great? It's a boat.. What has that got to do with… wait a minute" It is the Black Pearl!!!  
  
_Going back in time, we see what happened to Jack, Tina and the others:  
_  
"Jeez.. this ship sure looks empty" Chloe said to Tina. "Yeah.. perhaps Barracuda decided he didn't like this ship after all.. and who could blame him? I mean.. it's black! Not that black is a bad thing, but it doesn't fit with a ship" "I heard that" Jack growled behind them "Now let's get back to our ship, I don't trust this. All the rowboats are accounted for, so they couldn't have left the ship". Suddenly they heard someone clapping his hands. Swiftly Jack turned around only to find himself eye to eye with the man that stole his ship: Barracuda!  
  
Barracuda grinned, his sword unsheathed: "Good evening mister Jack Sparrow, to what do I own this pleasure?". Jack made a swaying movement, as to apologize: "Begging your pardon, but I've come to reclaim my ship, savvy?.. If you don't mind that is". Barracuda motioned his finger up, to make it seem like he was actually considering this possibility. But then he lifted his sword up to Jack: "I'm afraid that just won't do. Now how do the French say this again? En garde I believe?"  
Rain began to pour down. In their suspension they didn't even notice that the SS.Sexy was sailing away.  
  
Jack raised his sword too, it gleamed in the light of the torches the men of Barracuda were carrying. "En Garde it is, mate" he said and grinned his grin.  
-clang- The swords clashed against each other, sparks flying through the air. Barracuda surprised Jack, he was much better than he'd expected. Every attack he made, was blocked. Every attack Barracuda made, he dodged with some difficulty. "You're trained well, I must say" Barracuda said. "Aye.. Pirate you know?" Jack panted.  
  
Suddenly a big explosion lit up the sky.. the ship exploded. Jack was caught offguard: "Lona!" When he turned around again, the tip of Barracuda's sword was pressing against his throat. Jack dropped his sword and smiled: "I.. surrender?" he offered.  
  
Barracuda also smiled and motioned with his head below deck: "Follow Johnson ladies and gentlemen. He'll show you your accomodations".  
_Short.. I know.. but I've hit a writersblock.. and that thing is thick.. and hard.. ___


	10. Chloe I love you

_Chica Triste: You forbid me? Tss.. thank you.. LOL.. well.. you DID give me some inspiration.. just read it!_  
_Davve: Thank you.. my sister is my own personal PR manager  
Barley Shadow: Jack? He's on the SS Sexy **–grin- **He'll be back in the next chapter.. I promise. And yes.. my boyfriend is really cute and sweet and stuff.. I'd say he's even cuter then Jack. But then again.. I'm in love with him.. so I'd say anything.._  
  
**_Disclaimer: I don't own nothing.. not even myself...  
  
Chapter 10: Chloe.. I love you_**  
  
So.. now you know what happened to Jack and the others.. not much ey? Well.. that's what you think... Because something was happening between Chloe... and Will.  
  
"So.. how did you end up here anyway? I know the fairy tale Lona told me, but what's your story?" Will asked her, after being locked inside a cabin with everybody for 4 hours.  
"Well, I fell asleep one day, and woke up on this deserted island, in a rumcache.. or so it seemed. Lona found me there. She went home a few days later, but I decided it was way much more fun here!". Will just stared at her for a few seconds: "You.. fell asleep and ended up in a rumcache?" Chloe's face lightened up with a broad smile: "Uhhuh. Freaky huh?" "You could say that.. I personally prefer the term, interesting". He looked into her eyes, and moved a little bit closer towards her. And a little bit more. And then some more. "Erhm.. Will.. do I have something between my teeth or something? You're sitting awfully close" Chloe stammered.  
  
Will grabbed her hands, and held them between his: "Chloe, all those weeks in which I was sobbing over Elizabeth, it became clear to me: I never loved her!" Chloe's eyes widened: "W..wha?" Will came even closer to her face, if that is possible: "I mean, she left me for an one-eyed pirate with gross hair and awful teeth. You, on the other hand, are sweet, extremely beautiful and you was there for me when I needed you most" Chloe shifted uneasily on her seet: "Will, you disappeared the moment you heard about Elizabeth and.." Will stopped her talking with a gentle kiss on her lips.  
  
"Ey You two!! Get a room!" Jack hollered.  
Chloe stopped.. well.. doing everything altogether.. she didn't talk, she didn't breathe, she didn't even close her eyes. She just sat there.. completely surprised. Way too fast Will ended the kiss. "Chloe.. I think I'm in love with you" he whispered. Chloe didn't react at once. She just stared at him for a few seconds.. mouth slightly open. Then she started whispering: "Oh my gosh.. oh my gosh..". "Chloe? Are you okay?" Will asked, slightly concerned. Suddenly Chloe didn't look so happy anymore. She started pacing through the room, a worried look on her face: "No.. no.. you can't love me.. I mean.. I have to go back home eventually.. I have school you know? Have you got any idea what my parents would say when I bring back a pirate?" "Blacksmith" "Even worse!" She exclaimed. "Indeed.. a blacksmith is far more hideous then a pirate" James spat. "Shut up you" Tina gave him a whack at the head: "This is getting interesting".  
  
Will quickly stood up and wrapped his arms around her waist: "Don't worry, we'll find a way. No matter how far your country is, I'll make sure we both get there". Chloe turned around in his arms: "You really don't get it do you? That's sweet! But.. don't look at my like that! I'm trying to.. don't give me that puppy eyes look! Awh crap! Alright.. alright.. I'm in love with you too.. very much even.. but..but.." Will didn't even listen to her anymore, but as the happy fellow he was after hearing she loved him too, kissed her.. and didn't let go for the next half hour (trust me.. it is possible to kiss for a half hour!)  
  
And Now.. back to Lona and Prezz.. and all that.  
"Hey! Hellow?! Get your lazy behinds over here.. I found the SS. Sexy!" I yell while I run towards the house. After a little while the boys come out, dragging Le Djinquije with them.  
I raise one eyebrow: "Guys.. why are you dragging that behind you?" Wolf grins: "He's fun when he's scared. He yells like a girl you know? And he can serve us as a hostage". Frowning I look at Djinquije: "A hostage? Him? How? He doesn't know a thing". Djinquije winces a bit when he hears me say that: "Weeeelll... not knowing a thing is a bit.. erhm... broad" Prezzz waves a little book around: "He has a diary, and it says right here, he and Barracuda are plotting on a plot to conquer the world" Djinquije looks up a bit insulted: "Not exactly dear man, the world is too much area to rule for just 2 persons don't you think? The Caribbean alone would be quite sufficient" Jay rolls his eyes: "Shut up.. please do shut up" and he stuffs the gag back into Djinquije's mouth.  
  
Jay walks up to me and grabs my arm. He pulls me a bit away from the other three so we can have a private talk: "So, you found the Black Pearl? That's great. But.. erhm.. sweetheart, I think it's a good idea that us guys take it over from here" –Blink- Did he just say what I think he said? A looks around a bit nervous: "You see, it's a dangerous thing, hanging around with pirates, pointy sharp things lying around everywhere. And you know how clumsy you can be with sharp pointy things. And really.. honey.. erhm.. we're going to find you a nice hotel where you can wait until we come back to get you" I just stare at him.. I can see him swallow: "Okay? Sweety?" I smile my sweetest smile: "No" and turn around, walking back to the rest. "What do you mean.. no?!" Jay asks me, stopping me before I reach them. Looking up at him I answer: "Simple.. I mean no. I know you don't want me to get hurt, but I'll be fine.. trust me." He still doesn't look convinced. Sighing I ask him: "Jay.. Do you love me? I mean.. really love me?" He doesn't even need to think about it: "Yes!" "Do you trust me?" "Yeah.. but.." "Then trust me this time: I will manage".  
  
He looks the other way, obviously thinking this through. He sighs, a bit loud and nods. "Yay" I jump around a little and give him a little kiss on the cheek. "Thanks" I whisper and smile at him. "Alright! Let's get that boat back!" I shout at everybody.  
  
_Mkay.. so I DID do another chapter.. Don't y'all hate me now? You all thought you'd finally be ridden of that nonsense crap from me.. and here it is again... Ah well... life sux ;-) Review!!_


	11. Return to Monkey Island

_There..back again.. got one review from Barley Shadow to remind me that I've still got this story to finish! Thnx! _

_Disclaimer: I do not own POTC, nor do I own Monkey Island.. just read and DO NOT SUE!_

**Chapter 11: Return to Monkey Island!!**

Oh my gosh..did I really tell Jay that I would manage? Well.. I mean.. of course I can manage things quite well, unless I'm hanging on a rope very high above seawater!!

I had this great plan to sneak on board the SS Sexy using a rope. I just forgot that I'm afraid of hights. So sue me.

Now, I'm hanging somewhere halfway a rope that's dangling, like I said before, many many feet above lots of water, with Jay and Prezzz somewhere lower down the rope.

"Will you get on already?" Prezzz yells at me. J sighs: "Lona, sweetheart, I hate to tell you this, but I've warned you about coming with us! And now see what you've gotten us into! You do know that water is the hardest substance on earth do you?"

-Groan- "shut up! Shut up! Shut UP! I just want to get down.."

I feel someone moving: "And don't move! Please!" I hear Prezzz's voice again: "Where did Wolf go? He was right above you! He can heave you in" "No he can't!" J says: "She isn't close enough yet".

After that.. 5 minutes of silence. My arms are beginning to cramp up. Dammit. I really must find a way to get out of this situation. Preferably without moving a muscle. Suddenly the whole rope starts swaying, looking down I see a big arm that's pulling the rope into the ship! Jay and Prezzz already are hauled inside. They're going to capture me next! Noooooooo!

But because of my stupid body that thinks falling is a bad thing, I'm not really able to move. So I just hang there, letting my fate happen to me. I'm going to be captured by Barracuda! With a last yank on the rope I fall into the little porthole and land with a thud on the wood. Quickly I scramble back on my feet, putting my fists up in defence. I find myself looking at the throats of Wolf and Prezzz! Damn those tall people. Finally it occurs to me that I'm not being captured but that Wolf saved me! I jump up and cling to his neck: "Thank you, thank you, thank you!".

Jay just stands there, looking a bit jalouse. Prezzz is grinning like the maniac he is, Djinquije stands next to him, looking hurt... then who is tugging on my shirt? With one really hard tug, I fall back on my bum onto the wood. Looking around I see this girl, all red faced, and not too happy. "Get your hands off my.. I repeat... MY.. boyfriend!" She immediately walks to him and starts hugging him. Confused I stand up, rubbing my sore behind: "Yeah, sure.. I was only showing my gratitude because he sort of saved my life". Wolf grinned: "Don't mind her.. she's sort of fond of me. Doesn't like other girls hanging around"

Aww.. sure.. I can understand that. "In that case, I apologize.. Hi, my name is Ilona, or Lona. Please call me Lona, I like that one better. Ilona makes me feel so old. What's your name? And why are you on this ship? Do you know Barracuda?" "Do you ever stop talking?" The girl asks me, eyeing me suspiciously. "My name is Jacco.. I kind of work on this ship.." "Kind of?" Jay asks. She gives him a death glare: "I do the dishes.. that's not a real job now is it?"

Prezzz sits down on a barrel: "So we're in.. now what?" Good question. I didn't even think we'd come this far: "Erhm.. we take over the ship?" I offer. Prezzz makes a Hmpfing sound: "Right, the 7 of us, against a crew of at least 30 sailors?". He's got a point there.. let me think.. "Yeah..well.. whatever.. we've got the element of surprise you know. We can take 'em down as easy as 1, 2, 3" Wolf says, standing up, and already barging towards the door. "There's just one little problem with that" Jacco says. Jay looks at her: "And what might that be?" Wolf is rattling at the door, but it won't budge. Jacco shrugs: "I let the door fall into the lock accidentally and I sort of don't have the key. So.. we're locked in". Ah.. a problem I cán solve. I saw this in Monkey Island© once. All we need is a cannon, a feeble cannon restraint rope and a cutlass. Oh.. and also a talking skull.. but I don't think that's essential for the trick.  
  
We have a cannon.. ánd a cannon restraint rope. Yay! Only this cannon needs fire to be.. erhm... fired. Ghe.. makes sense doesn't it? Patting my pockets I luckily find a lighter. Only one more object to complete my master plan. "Does any of you guys have a sword, or maybe a Swiss army knife?" They all stare at me like I've gone crazy.. "What?" Djinquije smiles: "And what're you going to do what a little toothpick sword against all those sailors..hmmm?" "Oh blablabla, who says anything about using a sword against them? Hmm? First things first. We've got to get out of here, and for that I need a sharp thingie.. and maybe a talking skull.." Jay hands me his pocket knife: "Sorry, I don't have a talking skull". "Too bad, Murray is fun to keep around".

I take the knife and turn to the feeble cannon restraint rope "Aha! Taste cold steel, feeble cannon restraint rope!" With some effort I cut through the rope. "Well..that was easy". Nobody really understands what I'm doing.. clearly they've never played Monkey Island 3 before. Next thing, I fire the cannon.. I stand on the right side of the cannon, to prevent it from cannoning backwards into my stomach. "Everybody out of the way!" I yell when I light the fuse. The spark sizzles, and the cannon fires, a loud crash is to be heard..

_So.. what do you think happens? Did the door open? Or are we still trapped in there? Review and let me know y'hear? Thank you._


	12. Newly Wed

_Tadááá... another Chapter.. and it didn't take a whole month this time! Well..actually... Pirate Blondie blackmailed me.. So now, I expect another chapter from her, before I update this one again.. Or until I get bored again.. which ever comes first._

**_Chapter 12: Newly wed  
_**  
After all the smoke has cleared, we see that the cannon missed the door. It sort of went through the wall next to the door.

"You missed" Jacco states flatly, casually picking bits of wood out of her hair. Erhm.. yeah.. "You think?".

"Bloody 'ell!" Hey! I know that voice!. That's Jack! "Did I REALLY saw a cannon passing through here, or am I just hallucinating again?" And that's Tina! We found them.. yay! Prezzz has been hiding behind his barrel, but when he sees everything is just fine, he reappears again: "I protest! Did you really thought it necessary to blow up the whole damn ship?!". "I say.. who is that?" Sounds like James all right too.

"Tina!!" I quickly run through the hole in the wall towards my best friend, and give her a big hug. "Ey, and what about me luv'?" Oh crap.. forgot all about Jack... and Jay.. "Well.. what about you?" Jay asks him, arms folded across his chest. Uh-oh.. troubles. "Erhm.. Hi Jack. How are ya? I want you to meet some people. This is Prezzz, he's the president of Duck Island. That's Wolf, he's a bartender in a bar, erhm..right. That girl that's right next to him is Jacco, girlfriend. Ignore that guy on the rope, and this is Jay.. my.. boyfriend" He.. he.. hehe.. oops? Jack doesn't look too happy, and Jay is holding my waist all possessive like.  
  
Did I make a mistake? Stupid question, no I didn't.. I didn't seduce Jack, I didn't cheat on Jay. "So, Jay, Prezzz, Wolf and Jacco, let me introduce you to: Tina, my best friend, Chloe, another good friend of mine, I found her in some cache a while back and I decided to keep her, Jack.." "Captain Jack Sparrow.. If you'd like luv" -sigh- Childish fellow "Right,, cáptain Jack Sparrow, everybody knows him I think? That's James Norrington, the former commodore, and last but, judging by all the lipstick smear on his face and Chloe's flustered face, definitely not least: Will Turner, blacksmith, pirate and lover boy extraordinaire".

Prezzz walks to Tina and eyes her from top to bottom (literally): "Nice dress.. but I must protest on those boots you know?" Tina shrugs: "Yeah, well.. tough.. you don't like it, bite it". Not used to someone not commenting on his protests he's baffled.  
  
Chloe quickly runs her hands through her hair: "Hi Lona! What took you so long? Not that I minded being trapped in there... with Will.. and the others of course". Will looks at Jay, and did the same he does: he wraps his arm around Chloe's waist: "I'm coming back with you guys" he tells me. What? No.. no.. he can't.. can he? I don't even know how I should get back.. "...what?". Chloe turns even more reddish than before: "We are kind of.. well.. you know.. in love.. and stuff.. and.. well.. Jack is a captain.. and captains have the right to wed young couples.. and" Tina jumps up and down: "And they got married! And I was the bridesmaid! It was all very romantic, Barracuda provided the wine, and even some flowers, Jack was that priest guy and I caught the bouquet, so I'm the next who gets married"

I need to sit down for a moment. Jay holds my waist tighter as Jack approaches us a little closer "You okay luv? Y're lookin' a bit pale". I nod "Yeah I'm fine. Let's see if I understand this correctly, you, Chloe, a 15, perhaps 16 year old girl from the real world, got married to an Orlando Bloom look-a-like who's approximately 25 years old from this dvdworld?" "... and Norrie here was the witness, and Chloe looked lovely all drunk and stuff" Tina is still talking.

"I can see why you two are friends" Jacco sighs, rubbing her temples. I think she has a headache.

Chloe nods: "Erhm.. yeah.. fun huh?" She hazards a little smile. Oh boy.. now I really need to sit down.

"Where's this Barracuda dude?" Wolf asks. "He, and his fellow criminals, went to shore to get completely intoxicated and start a few brawls" Looks like James isn't looking forward at becoming a pirate anymore, he's talking "normal" again. "So...they're not here are they?" Hmm.. I think I'm getting a plan again. No..this time it's not inspired by Monkey Island. "Listen, here's what we'll do"

_So there, chapter 12.. And Chloe got married! And Jack and Jay certainly don't like each other. Hehe.. Oh I'm so mean. Oh I'm so sick in my head.. What'll be my wicked plan? Dunno yet.. REVIEW!! Please? Love, Lona_


	13. En GardeTouché Ooh, that's so cliché

_Yeah! Back again.. chapter 13. Seems like I'm only writing this for PirateBlondie.. oh well.. and for myself ofcourse. And the rest of the bunch who aren't members of But if anybody else reads this.. please review?_

_Anywho: Pirateblondie: Yeah! You're married! TO WILL!! Happy you! -grin- I'm still stuck with Jack and my boyfriend.. Thanks for reviewing all this time.. you dragged me through a whole bunch of writerblocks.. -gives mega smooch-  
  
I do not own POTC..blablabla.. you know the drill.. let's get on with it!_

**Chapter 13: Én garde.. Touché.. Ooh..that's so cliché**

"So.. he's your boyfriend ey?" It's about 2 hours later now and Jack and I are standing on deck, waiting for Barracuda to return. Sure, we could've just sailed away, without him knowing it, but where's the fun in that? "Yeah" "Nice fella I reckon'" "Yeah.. sorta" "He looks like a sissy though" "Does not!" "Does too!" "Not!" "Too!" "Shuddup! How can you know that? Stupid pirate" "Bloody woman". Well.. things are back to normal. He hates me, I hate him. It's all in a day's work I guess.

"We could've just sailed away ya know?" "Shuddup I said! I'm not hearing you! Lalalalala!" I'm pressing my hands against my ears. "Will ye stop doin' that?!" "My bonnie was over the ocean.. my bonnie was over the sea.. Still can't hear you!!" No.. I am not acting like a big baby!

Jack grabs my shoulders and starts to shake me: "Stop doing tha'! It's very annoying!". "Well well well, mister Sparrow.. not only are you a bad pokerplayer, but now you're a woman harasser as well? I would've never thought that you'd be capable of such a thing"

Jack snarls, but still doesn't let go of my shoulders: "I'm capable of things you wouldn't even dream about, Barracuda".

"Jack, will you let go of me already?" I plead, trying to sound as desperate as I can.. "No, I'm tryin' to teach you a lesson, no one mocks Captain Jack Sparrow" he shakes me a bit harder. I've got the feeling my head is about to pop off! "Jack, take it easy will you?" I hiss.

In case you haven't noticed.. we are trying to lure Barracuda in our trap. Did you honestly think Jack could be that mean to me? Nah.

"Captain Jack Sparrow, release the young lady and take on someone your own size!" Barracuda is trying to protect me. Just like we planned. Jack twirls me around until I stand before him, with my back against his chest. Suddenly he holds a knife to my throat! Hey! This wasn't part of my plan! I don't like knifes! "Jack! Let go of me!" I try to kick him against his knees, but I just can't reach them. "Someone my own size mate? I don't see anyone who can match me.". Barracuda obviously is anxious to save me from the clutches of this villain. To be honest.. I'm also anxious to get away from Jack. He's scaring me with that knife "Would you like to take on me then? Although you seem to think that I'm not worthy enough to challenge you.. I'd like to give it try. If only it is to save the young lady" Oeh.. charming. No.. wait.. he's the bad guy. Damn you, you damned hormones you. 

Jack growls and pushes me aside. He draws his sword: "Alright Barracuda, if you think you can take me, step on board. Alone! None of your little boyfriends will be able to help you when you lose". Barracuda looks dead serious and very angry. He gives his coat to one of his crewmembers and walks up the plank. I quickly give a signal to Chloe who's hiding behind a barrel next to the plank. Conveniently placed don't you think? Will is below deck, in one of the cabins, probably worried sick about Chloe. I can't really see why. She isn't in danger or anything. Well.. not a lot of danger that is. I mean.. she could be stabbed.. or shot.. or drowned.. or raped.. but honestly.. that should be about it.

Oh.. I forgot.. she could also be hanged.. and mutilated.. killed by a giant four headed monkey.. You get the picture I think.

Anyway, she nods to let me know that she understands. Barracuda steps off the plank onto deck: "Show me what you're made of Sparrow" he says in a dark husky voice. Dark Husky voice? Aiek.. I really need to have a decent talk with my hormones one of these days. The sound of metal against metal is to be heard, it sounds loudly in the quiet night. Everybody is looking intense at Jack and Barracuda, so intense that they don't notice Chloe, who very carefully and very stealth-like draws the walking plank in. "You're no match for me Jack, why don't you just give it up? I'll find you a nice place to stay.. on the bottom of the ocean!" "I'll make sure you've handpicked that place for me!" Jack's fighting like he's never fought before. Very good-looking sight indeed.

"Wolf! Pull up the anchor! Make sail!" suddenly everybody's on deck, being busy to get us out of here as fast as possible. Barracuda is baffled, he looks around him, not understanding what's happening. His crewmembers are shouting at us, but they've got no way they could get on board the ship. Before long, the ports of Tortuga or nothing more than a dot shrinking away in the distance. Barracuda now stands alone, surrounded by all of us, with the point of Jacks sword pressed against his throat.

"Well.. I really do think that I've won.. don't you mate?" Jack flashes his golden grin. Barracuda looks at everybody, as if to remember us all by sight. He doesn't seem too happy about the situation. Then his gaze drops on Djinquije "YOU!" Djinquije tries to shrivel away, or at least behind Prezzz's legs. "Me? No.. not me.. I didn't do anything" Suddenly, out of nowhere, Barracuda jerks his head away from the sword, draws a dagger and grabs Tina. "Now.. everybody.. do as I say.. or I'll kill the little lady" he drags the tip of the dagger across Tina's cheek, drawing a few drops of blood.

_Oh no! Not Tina! To be honest.. I myself didn't even expected this to happen.. I just made it up 2 minutes ago.. creativity is scary. Hope Tina still likes me after this.. what am I saying? I hope Barra (yes.. he is an actual existing person.. only his name isn't really Barra..duh.. we just call him that) doesn't hate me after what I made him go through.._

_Review..please? It's not like I'm holding a gun to your head or anything.. and it's not like I'm threatening to stop writing if you don't review either.. I'm just asking you very very nicely: review?_

_Love, Lona_


	14. You nitwit!

_Pirateblondie: Of course I won't quit writing.. I love it.. especially since I don't have a clue where this story is going.. so strange. _

_Krazycaribe: Yeah..but Guybrush IS cute.. in his own.. silly.. not very smartish way._

_Well. I'm back again.. Barra doesn't hate me! Yay.. he even helped figuring out what to write next.. So.. If you don't like something in this chapter.. it's his fault.. if you like things in here.. I did it._

_Lolz.. no no.. I wrote it, he only helped thinking how I could save Tina._

**I don't own POTC**

_**Chapter 14: You nitwit!**_

"No! You let her go!" I try to reach Tina but Jack grabs me by my waist and shoves me into Jay's arms. "What's wrong mate? Can't handle it no more?" Jack asks in a low voice. I'm scared. For the first time in this world.. I'm truly, honestly scared. Scared for what he will do to her. I can feel tears streaming over my face: "Let her go, or I'll swear I'll make the rest of your life so miserable you'd wish I'd kill you" Prezzz hisses at Barracuda. Barracuda doesn't seem impressed, instead he just presses the knife harder against her cheek. I struggle to break free from Jay's grasp. His face looks grim as he's clenching his jaws together. "Let go of me! If you hurt her anymore I'll kill you myself! Let go!" Very near at becoming hysterical I finally break free from Jay's arms and I fling myself at Barracuda. "No! Lona!". Without letting go of Tina, Barracuda grabs his pistol and aims it at me. But, silly me you might say, I don't pay attention to it. Without thinking I simply grab the arm with which he holds Tina and push her out of his reach. It isn't until after that, I realize what a stupid thing that was for me to do. Because.. well.. now he can grab me. "Crap" Quickly I try to turn around and run away from him away.

But to no avail. I just turned my back to him when I hear the –click- that means I'm really a foolish, not able to think, blond, not smart girl. Tina gives a little scream, she fell on her knees and didn't get back up on her feet quick enough. He grabbed her again. Barracuda grins: "So now I've got two hostages.. how convenient, don't you think Sparrow?". His hand clutches around my arm, dragging me towards him. "Gentlemen, if you would be so kind to jump into the water? Or else this will be the last you'll see of these two ladies.. well.. alive that is". Chloe looks helplessly at Will and asks Barracuda: "Gentlemen? And what about us?". Did you notice that Barracuda isn't that charming as I first thought he was? And that his smile isn't sweet and cute but just wicked? Yeah. "You two, will join your two lady friends here, the gentlemen will take a little swim.. NOW!" He sets the gun at my head: "Hey! Watch where you're aiming that thing!". Barracuda sighs: "I know where I'm aiming it.. what use would my threat be if I didn't know it?" Oh.. right "You've got a point there".

The boys are walking to the erhm.. railing..thing.. wussname that thing that prevents you from falling into the water.. made of wood.. looks like medieval bars. "No! Wait!" Barracuda A/N I normally don't do author notes ..but for the sake of my RSI prevention measurements, I will now refer to Barracuda as Barra.. thank you/A/N rolls his eyes: "Now what? If you think I'll let one of them stay here because he's your boyfriend or lover or whatever then you're ver much mistaken" "No, no, no, you've got it all wrong. They can swim.. at least.. I hope so.. Now that you mention it. I never ever saw Jay swim, but that.." "Get to the point already!" "Sjees.. take a chill pill.. what I was saying.. Shouldn't they take their shirts off? I mean.... Their. Erhm. Clothes could get wet.. and.. erhm.. well.. ghehe". Please, please say yes.. I really wanna see Jack topless.. "No! What do you want to do to me? Make me blind? I don't wanna see the Commodore half naked" Hey! "That's not nice! You tell James you're sorry for insulting him and you hmpfpfffpfrt!" Tina claps her hand on my mouth. "Sorry mister evil pirate sir.. she tends to talk too much".

2 minutes after that.. the boys are in the water and we girls are standing with Barra.. who still holds the gun. "So now what?" Jacco asks. I shrug "I dunno" "Argh.. that stings! Be careful!" that's Tina.. I'm cleaning up that cut on her cheek... with rum! Glad Jack doesn't see this. "I want my Will back and I want him back NOW! You.. you.. Will killer!"

If I were Barra.. I wouldn't lay that gun down for a while. Chloe is getting a tad bit aggressive. I think she'd really kill him if she gets the chance.. hang him upside down on the crow's nest by his little toe or something would be more fun if you'd ask me.

"Will you all just shut up for a moment? I need to think" "Question.. you're pointing a gun at us, you've just thrown our friends in the water..and now you're asking us to shut up? You've only got one shot in there, I know that.. I've seen the movie. And frankly.. I don't give a damn that you can't think, you should've started thinking a bit sooner mister!" I'm standing before him with my hands on my hips, tapping my foot on deck. "How dare you say that to me? Have you forgotten that I'm the one with the gun? Never mind that anyway.. you four are going to help me sail away on this ship"

We all raise our eyebrows "Excuse me? We.. help you? I don't think so" Jacco simply turns her back at him. Me, Chloe and Tina hold our hands up in defence: "Don't look at us.. we don't know a thing about boats and sailing" "I do know this is a ship.. not a boat ..I think" Tina states. Barra sighs and his eye twitches "So.. you're saying.. that I'm stuck here.. in the middle of the ocean.. on a ship.. that cannot be handled by one man.. with 4 maids.." "Maids?! I'm no maid!" "Shut up.. with 4 maids that don't even know how to sail? Great.. I'm doomed". "There.. now... don't pick at it.. or it won't heal and leave a nasty scar" I finally finished with Tina's cheek. "And since we're just sitting around here doing nothing because mister dodobrains over there didn't think of the consequences of his rash actions, I'm going to have a look around this ship"

Barra jumps up and for the, I lost the count actually.. but it is sure a lot, time in this story points a gun at me: "You aren't going anywhere" I've had it with him! "Will you quit being all dominating and stuff? We've got no place to go, no place to hide, you're the one who's in charge here. But I'm am NOT staying on deck all day getting a sunburn just because you were too stupid to think before you threw the sailors overboard. You nitwit! So if you want to shoot me.. shoot me.. but I'm going downstairs". Not paying attention to him any longer I'm marching down.. and big surprise.. he didn't shoot me. Instead, he throws Jacco, Tina and Chloe also down into the cabins and locks the door that leads to deck. That rude person.

_There.. done.. now I'm stuck.. how do I get myself..and my friends of this ship? Help me?_

_Eek..is it just me.. or did I wrote more then I used to?_

_Love, Lona_


	15. Vampire?

_Phew.. working is taking a lot of my time..so I can't update that often.. And PirateBlondie hasn't updated either! So my blackmail didn't work :(_

_Ah well.. Disclaimer: I don't own anything.. I do own Victor.. but you don't know who he is yet._

**Chapter 15: Vampire?**

"Wow.. nice bedroom" "Yeah.. too bad it's kinda smelly.. and dusty. Do men ever clean their rooms?" "This is disgusting!" Tina holds up a apple.. with one bite out of it.. unfortunately that bite was about 4 weeks ago. The apple is all shriveled up now, and green.. moldy green.

But, apart from the dusty-ness and smelly-ness.. and rotten apple-ish it really is a nice room. Spacey, with a huge wardrobe closet thing. Speaking about the closet.. is it just me.. or do I hear noises coming from it? "Lona.. the closet.. someone is in there!". Nope.. it isn't just me.

Carefully we sneak towards the closet, me first, Tina behind me, holding my waist, Jacco behind her, and Chloe as last. With some hesitation I lay my hand on the doorknob, and gently turn it around...

With great violence something comes crashing out of the closet, bumping into us, toppling us over. "Ow.. watch it!" "Get off me!" "I can't, someone is sitting on my foot!" "What in Guybrush name was that!" "LONA!" Not again.. it's getting way too crowded in here.. that voice is from.. I can't even say it.. "No..you get back where you came from!" "But.." "No.. I'm serious! Go, or I'll tell mom you didn't do your homework like you promised her"

"Cindy!" "Tina!" Cindy is my sister.. she's 17 years old.. and can be annoying like.. well. .something very annoying. And she followed me here! "How did you get here?" "Through your closet.. I saw Jay going in there.. and wanted to know what he did.. and next thing I knew, I stood in Port Royal! Great town.. but.. I didn't found you there.. So I crept back in the nearest closet.. and here I am! Ain't you happy now?" I grunt and close my eyes.

Then a thought goes through my mind.. If she got here that way.. we could escape that way. But only a few of us fit into that thing. Two of us have to stay behind. At least. So we decide to draw straws. Unfortunately we can't find the straws. That bloody Sparrow has a water bed! Can you believe it? I didn't even know they had those things so many years ago. Jacco draws her knife and slices the moldy, greeny apple into 5 pieces.. 2 pieces shorter and moldier than the others. And me and Chloe both draw them. Crap.

Everybody stuffs themselves back into the closet. My sister even waves at me: "Bye Lona.. See you later" Yeah.. whoopiediedooh.. With a bang I shut the closet door. "Good riddance. Isn't it enough that I have to put up with her every day already?". Chloe just grins. "So.. now we're here.. stuck with that.. how did you call him again? Nitwit?" "Yeah.. I know.. but it was getting really crowded in here" I didn't even finish my sentence yet when the blasted thing crashes open.. AGAIN! "If everybody would just stop barging in here!" I shout at the person that is lying on the floor. The person growls.. and his clothes are.. old fashioned... ergo: he isn't someone I know. It raises its head, slowly, blond hair falling in front of his eyes. So far he's looking mighty interesting. But as he raises his head further, Chloe and I decide to take a few paces away from him. His skin is greenish pale, and he shows his teeth as he growls again. These teeth.. aren't normal. He has two, slightly huge, fangs. I think I drank too much.. wait.. I didn't drink.. I'm staring at an actual vampire. "That's it.. I've really had it." I stomp forwards towards the.. thing.. creature.. whatever and look him straight in the eye.. erhm.. sorry.. nose.. he is slightly larger then I am.

"Listen.. I don't know who you are.. or why you're here.. but just leave me alone!" He has really beautiful eyes. Also green, but a more vivid green then the apple or his skin. He grunts. Seems like that's the only sound he can make, but he doesn't seem to want to attack me. Or.. bite me.. or something like that. Chloe is rattling with the doorhandle shouting: "LET US OUT!! There's a vampire in here! No! Seriously!!" But Barracuda is ignoring her. Probably thinking she's gone crazy. The vampire looks back at me, his teeth showing all the time. He brings his hand up and I wince, afraid for he might do.

_Well.. it's a short one.. but I've got it up.. Hope you don't mind me bringing in the vampire. I've got a slight crush on this particular vampire I met at an amusementspark._

_Love, Lona_


	16. French Romeo yuck

_Aww Jeez.. this took me a hell of time to write. But here it is, finally.. The writersblock has been torn down, so expect a few more updates the next few weeks.. Enjoy!!_

_**Disclaimer: I only own Victor.. and Victor's picture.**_

He offers me his hand.. I can't believe it.. I was really expecting a blow to the head or something. "Good afternoon, I'd like to introduce myself. My name is Victor Lemesurier. And I have the pleasure of meeting…?" Chloe is still hammering on the door, but the only reply she's getting is silence. "Erhm.. I'm Lona, that's Chloe.. could you just hold on one second? Thanks.." I carefully walk backwards to Chloe, never letting Victor out of my sight. If you'll turn your back at a vampire.. you'll never do it again.

I grab Chloe's arm: "Will you stop doing that? Barracuda is long gone.. I saw him floating on some wine barrels a few minutes ago" "LET US OU.. you're kidding me right? You mean I've been banging on this door for the last ten minutes for nothing?

"Well..basically.. yes". "Crap.. darn that guy… so.. the vampire dude still here?" "Yup.. standing right behind you actually" "Really now?" "Yup" "No use in screaming and running away?" "No use that I can think of, no" "Ah" "Yes". Victor has been listening to our conversation with polite calmness. "Chloe.. this is Victor.. erhm.. Lemmesomething.. Victor.. this is Chloe" "Lemesurier" "What?" "My name.. Lemesurier" "Oh..right.. I'll just call you Victor.. alright?"

We all just kind of stand there now. "So.. what do we do now?" Chloe asks me. "How should I know?" "Is there a problem ladies?" Victor glances at the closed door "Ah, the door won't open I see, perhaps I can be of some assistance". I beam at Victor while he's walking towards the door: "Well, I appreciate the offer.. really.. but I don't think" Without much trouble Victor lifts the oak entrance door from its hinges and throws the door on deck. Chloe peeks around the corner "Gee.. I guess there are some advantages to being an undead pirate". Victor is walking towards the steering wheel and grabs it with full self-confidence. "Ah.. the salty smell of the sea, the wind in my hair.. I love sailing". "So.. you kinda know how to ride this thing?" Chloe nudges me in the ribs: "You don't ride a ship, silly.. you drive it.. there's a subtle difference between those two things". Victor gives us a weird look "What is this.. driving.. you talk about? It is.. like horseback riding.. non?" Right.. so you don't ride or drive a ship.. another lesson learned today "Not exactly.. just.. carry on with whatever you're doing".

He grins and grabs Chloe's hand "Madame, for you.. I'll sail the seven sea's and conquer all the ships you'd want" he starts slobbering all over her hand, like a love sick puppy. Disgusting really. But then again.. French undead pirates are strange. "Yeah yeah Romeo, could you just get us back to Tortuga please? Our friends are waiting there for us.. including her HUSBAND". Did you notice the way I emphasized on the husband part? I did so he'd know she's married and stuff. Just in case Chloe would forget about it. "A husband? Mais non.. c'est terrible! My poor heart is shattered, who is this lucky man? Tell me, so I know who stole the woman of my desire from me even before I met her". What? Did he really say that? Ew! Somebody give that guy something to wipe the slime from his mouth. "I don't think you know him Vic, his name is Will Turner, he's a blacksmith" Chloe says, her cheeks flushed all red and adorable and stuff. I feel like I'm trapped in some really bad soap show. "A blacksmith? My love is married to a mere blacksmith?! Merde! Ce n'est pas possible!" "Alright, enough of this, will you get started with sailing us back to main shore already?" Grabbing Chloe I drag her away from the drooling pirate "Will you stop doing that already?" I hiss at Victor "She isn't available, and besides, it would never work out between the two of you. I mean.. she's married, not French at all and you are.. well.. dead.. you know?" I pat him on the back encourage-like. "Listen, I'm sure, somewhere on this world is some nice, sweet dead girl who falls madly in love with you. But Chloe just isn't your type.. Trust me on this one".

Victor sniffles a little, like he's about to cry "Ah well.. but I've been alone for a very long time now yes? I'm longing for a partner, a partner du amour". He sighs, I shift around uneasily "Listen.. if it means that much to you, maybe I can be some sort of help? I mean.. I have this girlfriend, who is kinda single..". Suddenly Victor grabs my hands and spins me around merrily "Merci, merci, ma cherié, you really would do that for me?" Aaaah.. I hate being spinned around "Yes, yes, yes… just.. stop and put me down already!" Finally he lets go of my arms "And where would this young lady be?" Uugh.. I don't feel so good "Tortuga I imagine" "Then Tortuga it is!!" He spins a bit on the steering wheel, and like a miracle, we're moving forward!.

_Well..done.. tell me if you liked it or not_

_Love, Lona_


	17. Going to France

_Yes..well.. –coughs- right.. After not updating for over a year.. I'm back.. and.. well.. ghe.. a lot of things happened.. things I really should work into my story.. Anyways.. I'm back..poor yous.. is that a word? Yous? Probably not.. ah well.. still POTC addicted.. and probably worse after I've seen the sequel.. -laughs evilly- Anywho.. enjoy my new chapter..right after I've finished reading my own story since I don't quite know how it goes anymore.. -smacks own forehead-_

**Chapter 17  
_I only own myself..and Victor.._**

So.. we're sailing. And let me tell you.. it's boring. Chloe is sitting on the stairs, swinging her legs humming a tune "56 bottles of beer on the wall.. you take one down, pass it around, 55 bottles of beer on the waaaall.." She started the song with 999901 bottles of beer.. Someone.. please save me!

Victor is still sailing the ship.. I didn't even remember we were this far offshore. I'm starting to get suspicious.. "Victor.. are you sure we're heading the right way?" "Ah, but yes off course.. Tortuga..non?" "Yeah.. but.. we've been sailing so long now.. and well.. frankly.. I haven't seen you use any compasses or maps or whatever you sailingguys use for navigation.. ever thought about TomTomGo for that matter because that would.." "Yes, yes.. but first.. we're sailing to France! Ah.. France! How I love here.. Je t'adore.." –blinks- France? Right.. he's kidding.. right? I mean.. I know he's an undead-dead-zombie-pirate guy.. but.. they must have a sense of humour..right? No..

"Victor.. why.. In the name of my dead canary.. are we sailing to France?" "Because, ma cherié, that's we're I've been born.. My home country.. you'll love it, non?" "No! Remember that single friend I have? She's in Tortuga.. about 2 days the other way around!" "Hm.. qui.. Dilemma's.. dilemma's.. but still.. France it is.." Arggh! Nooo!

"48 bottles of bee.. hey.. what's wrong?" Chloe walks over and I can see Victor straightening up. Hmm.. If I would be a cartoon-character at this moment, a little light bulb floating above my head would have indicated my brilliant idea.. but since I'm not in a cartoon.. I'll just mention it: I have an idea.

"Well.. Victor here.. thinks we should go to France.. not to Tortuga.." Chloe glares at Victor. "He what? He..he.. you you you….YOU!" She marches up to Victor and starts waving a finger under his nose "You are turning this vessel around this very minute mister! And I mean now!" Victor's face looks pale..well..paler.. less green.. and he begins to stammer "But.. but.. ma cherie.." "But me no butts! I said NOW! And I'm not a cherry.." Victor finally gives in and turns the ship around.

Ha! Mission accomplished. So after another boring 2 days we arrive back in Tortuga. "Now what?" Chloe asks me. Good question.. indeed.. what now? Strolling along the docks I'm keeping a look out for the guys.. and for a way to lose our great guy Victor here. He's scaring away everybody. I mean.. someone who's green.. with fangs and stuff.. people tend to dislike such persons.

"Oi! Lona!" A giant somebody is running towards me! Aah! Oh..no..wait.. It's Wolf! Filled with joy.. well.. at the very least being very happy.. I run to him and give him a big hug. "Wolf! We thought we'd never find you guys! Where's.." Somebody yanks me away from Wolf. "I told you before.. MINE!" "Hi Jacow" Jacow is scowling at me.. Brushing myself off I ask Wolf "Where is everybody?" Wolf points to a nearby pub "There".

I take Chloe's hand and we burst into the pub.Here we find Jack.. totally drunk, crying over his lost and beloved Black Pearl. "Why? Why? Why did I have to be so stupid? Why did I think I could defeat that blasted Barracuda?" At another table sits Barracuda, absolutely oblivious of the fact that Jack is sitting at a table just across the pub." Why..why.. why was I so stupid as to lose a grand ship as the S.S. Sexy.. to a..an..undead zombiepirate dude and a few girls?" He emphasises this remark by banging his head on the table.

"Jack! We have her! We have the BlackPearl back!" Jack looks up.. his eyes all watery and red.. not a pretty sight at all.. "Aye lass.. thank you for trying to chear me up.. but it's all right.. I know I've lost 'er forever.." Ugh..men.. self pity.. ugh.. Chloe grabs Jacks hand and drags him out of the pub. Wolf stands right behind Barracuda and pulls him out of the chair by his collar " You're coming with me" he growls.. Nobody has ever heard about Barracuda ever since...

Outside Jack finally realizes he has his ship back.. and is actually hugging the rudder... -freaked out- I hug Chloe.. it's time to go home again.. "Well.. it has been fun..erhm.. on second thought.. it hasn't been fun.. but..still.. hope to see you again soon" With these words I turn around and start looking for another closet.. but..yeah.well.. ever tried to find a wardrobe in a port? Let me tell you.. there are very few of that around.. As I walk here and there I suddenly trip over a rock and fall in the mucky water of the port..

Spluttering and gasping for breath I surface again.. to find myself in my own bedroom.. with Tina lying on the bed next to me.. and my boyfriend.. Jasper (not J!) lying onder the covers with me.. on the tv screen I see the last few scenes of Pirates of the Caribbean.. it was all just a dream..again..wait a minute.. is that? On the screen I see Norrington walking past.. wearing the same silly outfit as in my dream.. he walks closer to the screen and taps on the glass " Miss Lona.. I have to say..thank you.. You made me realize I'm not cut out to be a pirate.. untill next time" He waves and the screen turns black..

It was all a dream

_So..end of story :D We (as in..Tina and me) ar figuring out a new plot to write about..specially since Dead Man's Chest is coming out soon.. I replaced J..as you can see..because..well..he's not my boyfriend anymore.. I now have a very cute boyfriend..Jasper! Almost a year! But that's beside the point..really.. just thought I'd explain.._

_Review please!_

_--  
Love, Lona_


	18. Viva La France!

_**There.. I redid this chapter.. because Chloe was right.. it sucked..it still sucks.. but at least now I'll try to make a proper ending without any loose ends..**_

**Chapter 18: Viva la France!**

So.. we're sailing. And let me tell you.. it's boring. Chloe is sitting on the stairs, swinging her legs humming a tune.. "56 bottles of beer on the wall.. you take one down, pass it around, 55 bottles of beer on the waaaall.." She started the song with 999901 bottles of beer.. Someone.. please save me!

Victor is still sailing the ship.. I didn't even remember we were this far offshore. I'm starting to get suspicious.. "Victor.. are you sure we're heading the right way?" "Ah, but yes off course.. Tortuga..non?" "Yeah.. but.. we've been sailing so long now.. and well.. frankly.. I haven't seen you use any compasses or maps or whatever you sailingguys use for navigation.. ever thought about TomTomGo for that matter because that would.." "Yes, yes.. but first.. we're sailing to France! Ah.. France! How I love her.. Je t'adore.." –blinks- France? Right.. he's kidding.. right? I mean.. I know he's an undead-dead-zombie-pirate guy.. but.. they must have a sense of humour..right? No..

"Victor.. why.. In the name of my dead canary.. are we sailing to France?" "Because, ma cherié, that's where I've been born.. My home country.. you'll love it, non?" "No! Remember that single friend I have? She's in Tortuga.. about 2 days the other way around!" "Hm.. qui.. Dilemma's.. dilemma's.. but still.. France it is.." Arggh! Nooo!

"48 bottles of bee.. hey.. what's wrong?" Chloe walks over and I can see Victor straightening up. Hmm.. If I would be a cartoon-character at this moment, a little light bulb floating above my head would have indicated my brilliant idea.. but since I'm not in a cartoon.. I'll just mention it: I have an idea.

"Well.. Victor here.. thinks we should go to France.. not to Tortuga.." Chloe glares at Victor. "He what? He..he.. you you you….YOU!" She marches up to Victor and starts waving a finger under his nose "You are turning this vessel around this very minute mister! And I mean now! I have this thing called a husband waiting for me..and I'm not letting you spoil all that..!" Victor's face looks pale..well..paler.. less green.. and he begins to stammer "But.. but.. ma cherie.." "But me no butts! I said NOW! And I'm not a cherry.." Victor finally gives in and turns the ship around.

Ha! Mission accomplished. So after another boring 2 days we arrive back in Tortuga. "Now what?" Chloe asks me. Good question.. indeed.. what now? Strolling along the docks I'm keeping a look out for the guys.. and for a way to lose our great guy Victor here. He's scaring away everybody. I mean.. someone who's green.. with fangs and stuff.. people tend to dislike such persons.

"Oi! Lona!" A giant somebody is running towards me! Aah! Everybody flee! The giants are coming!

Oh..no..wait.. It's Wolf! Filled with joy.. well.. at the very least being very happy.. I run to him and give him a big hug. "Wolf! We thought we'd never find you guys! Where's.." Somebody yanks me away from Wolf. "I told you before.. MINE!" "Hi Jacow" Jacow is scowling at me..

Brushing myself off I ask Wolf "Where is everybody?" Wolf points to a nearby pub "There".

I take Chloe's hand and we burst into the pub.Here we find Jack.. sitting at a table in the corner, totally drunk, crying over his lost and beloved Black Pearl. "Why? Why? Why did I have to be so stupid? Why did I think I could defeat that blasted Barracuda?"

"Jack! We have her! We have the BlackPearl back!" Jack looks up.. his eyes all watery and red.. his nose looks almost the same..just add some runny green looking goo..not a pretty sight at all.. "Aye lass.. thank you for trying to chear me up.. but it's all right.. I know I've lost 'er forever.." Ugh..men.. self pity.. ugh.. Chloe grabs Jacks hand and drags him out of the pub.

Outside Jack finally realizes he has his ship back.. and is actually hugging the rudder...  
-_freaked out_- So.. Jack has his Pearl Back.. but there's still this little problem of an undead pirate..and a Barracude slithering around somewhere.Not to mention that we're still missing a few members of the crew.. Prezzz and Will and J..

"Jack.. could you please stop making love to your ship and start paying attention to the problem at hand here?"  
Reluctantly Jack let's go of the ship.  
"What problem luv? I've got me ship back!"  
-_palmface-__  
_Chloe clips Jack at the head.  
"The entire world doesn't evolve about the Pearl only, Jack.. We know it's hard for you to understand, but trust us..it doesn't."

Jack rubs the back of his head and looks a little bit insulted.  
"Aye.. but that still doesn't tell me what problem you are talking about"  
"Problem number one: WHERE IS MY HUSBAND!"

Suddenly a animal like yelp can be heard.  
We spin around and see Barracuda standing there.. holding a knife at Victor's throat. Vampires can't be killed by throatslicing..can they? Right? On the other hand..Victor is standing very still..and he's making a point of not moving..so.. the chances that he can get killed.. are pretty big.

Barracuda sniggers  
"Well well well.. the infamous Jack Sparrow"  
"CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow" Chloe and I chorus before Jack can say anything.  
"Will you two bloody stop bloody doing that!" Jack shouts in frustration.  
"As I was saying.." Barracuda cuts in "Thank you, Sparrow.. for returning my ship to me"  
"Your ship? It's my ship Barra.. you only won because you cheated!"  
"Pirate"  
Looking at Jack, Chloe nods her head  
"Well.. you could've expected someone to use that against you.."

Jack just glowers at Chloe.  
"And what if I decide to keep my ship?"  
"Then the green freak dies!"

**A short chapter.. I know.. I hope this chapter was a little bit better.. :)**


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